Even though we’ve been having blizzards, you can sense that spring is around the corner. Spring’s a season of new beginnings, and that spirit of renewal has me looking inward, asking where I can grow next. Lately, that question has led me to my meditation practice (or lack thereof).
If we accept the idea that we can’t solve a problem in the same state of mind in which it was created, then we need reliable ways to shift that state. Meditation is one of the most common tools people turn to for relaxation, reconnecting, and creating space for clarity. But traditional meditation doesn’t work for me.
This is what I figured out: meditation with a structured, story-based approach works with the brain instead of against it. And, combining safety, focus, imagery, and narrative creates something far more powerful than quiet. It builds internal leadership.
If you’ve ever struggled to “empty your mind,” this might be a better way.
Hopefully, you’ll find this helpful!
A Better Way to Meditate
I’ve tried many techniques to try to calm my mind. Even when I succeeded, it felt like a one-off event, and too much effort for not enough return. I’m a results-driven person and had to find a way to combine my quest for “spiritual enlightenment” and self-improvement so that I would be willing to commit to a regular practice. After much trial and error, I created this technique and am excited to share it.
Meditation has a branding problem. Most versions ask you to clear your mind, detach from thoughts, and float serenely above your life like a wise balloon. This is lovely in theory. In real life, it often feels like sitting in a room with a smoke alarm and politely requesting silence. The modern nervous system is not calm. It is stimulated, interrupted, and trained to react. Social media platforms are designed to fracture attention through novelty-seeking behavior, constant comparison, and endless micro alerts. Your brain does not interpret that as neutral entertainment. It interprets it as a steady stream of signals that something important might be happening. So instead of asking the mind to become quiet by force, this practice does something more realistic. It organizes the mind through sequence.
This is a better way to meditate because it is built on neurobiology rather than wishful thinking. Safety comes first. Then focus. Then meaning. When the body feels safe, the prefrontal cortex can lead. When attention is narrowed, the mind stops scattering. When an image is turned into a story, the brain encodes it as identity. You are not chasing enlightenment. You are building internal leadership.
The method uses the Self-Acknowledgment Hug, a backward countdown, a success image, and a spoken or written story, then closes with another hug. The goal is simple. You believe in what you repeatedly do. When you repeatedly practice safety, focus, and successful self-direction, the brain begins to accept that as the new normal.
Here is the practice, step by step.
Step One. Begin with the Self Acknowledgment Hug
Sit down. Place both feet on the floor. Wrap your arms around yourself and apply steady pressure. Then say, slowly and clearly: “I love you, [Your Name]. We will always be together. We will always be safe. We are enough. We demand and expect better.” This works because physical pressure supports parasympathetic regulation, while naming yourself activates self-referential networks in the brain. Speaking in the plural creates internal attachment. The nervous system calms when it feels accompanied.
Step Two. Count backward from twenty-five to one
Count slowly from twenty-five down to one. With each number, repeat your Word of the Day or a steadying word such as Focus. Backward counting recruits working memory and engages the prefrontal cortex, which strengthens executive control. Repeating the same word narrows attention and interrupts distraction loops. If you lose your place, return to the last number you remember and continue.
Step Three. Create one clear image of success
When you reach one, pause. Form a single still image of yourself succeeding in something specific. If you are a trader, see yourself completing a successful trade with patience and clean execution. Keep the image realistic and grounded. The brain encodes vivid mental rehearsal in neural networks that overlap with lived experience. This is how rehearsal becomes familiarity.
Step Four. Turn the image into a story out loud or on paper
Now say the story aloud or write it. This is essential because language consolidates learning and strengthens memory encoding across multiple neural systems. Narrative gives the brain a script. For example, say or write, “I am a good trader, and found a potentially viable opportunity. I have been patiently waiting for this moment to pounce. I waited, made the trade, and I won. Hooray!” This line is short, emotional, and behavioral. It encodes restraint, timing, agency, and reward.
Step Five. Close with another hug
Hug yourself again. Apply steady pressure. Say something simple, such as, “We did well. We are aligned. We are safe.” The process of closing matters because the brain prefers completed cycles. A finished sequence reduces internal tension and reinforces stability.
In a world of engineered distraction, three ideas make this approach work:
1. Safety must come before insight.
2. Focus must come before imagination.
3. Story must come before belief.
This is why it is a better way to meditate. It does not require you to escape your humanity. It trains you to organize it. Repeated daily, the practice builds internal trust because it is action-based. You believe in what you do. When you repeatedly practice safety, focus, and successful self-leadership, the better mind becomes available, not as a miracle, but as a habit.
Here’s to your personal success,
Professor Marilyn Horowitz
New on Substack
My Substack community is growing, and it’s becoming a thoughtful space for reflection, creativity, and honest conversation. I’d love for you to be part of it. It’s free to subscribe, and each installment explores writing, personal development, neuroscience-based practices, and the deeper questions that shape how we live and create.
I am not a neuroscientist. I am a story expert. The connection between the two is simpler than it sounds. They are both built on pattern recognition. Neuroscience studies how the brain recognizes patterns to survive. Story studies how humans recognize patterns in order to make meaning. In both cases, pattern determines outcome.
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